What's a crash blossom?

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Tue Aug 18, 2009 4:34 am

danbloom · **Posted:** Tue Aug 18, 2009 5:02 am

linked? the hed makes it look like she was a survivor of the crash, but not that case. what do you call these kinds of strangely phrased hedlines? is there a word for them?

Crash blossoms?

subtle_body · **Posted:** Tue Aug 18, 2009 8:48 am

I think you answered your own question, Dan. "Crash blossom" would be an excellent neologism for infelicitously worded headlines.

danbloom · **Posted:** Wed Aug 19, 2009 2:13 am

subtle_body wrote:

I think you answered your own question, Dan. "Crash blossom" would be an excellent neologism for infelicitously worded headlines.

Credit for this neologism must go to Nessie3. Hear! Hear! I love it.

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:11 am

A lo, a crash blossom to end all crash blossoms:

Man held for attempted murder of policeman after detention for confining girl expires

danbloom · **Posted:** Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:30 am

Nessie3 wrote:

A lo, a crash blossom to end all crash blossoms:

Man held for attempted murder of policeman after detention for confining girl expires

That's exhausting to read........ you have an eye for these crash blossoms!

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:47 am

danbloom wrote:

Nessie3 wrote:

A lo, a crash blossom to end all crash blossoms:

Man held for attempted murder of policeman after detention for confining girl expires

That's exhausting to read........ you have an eye for these crash blossoms!

More like Japan Today and the Kyodo News wire service have a rare talent for them.

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Thu Aug 20, 2009 9:56 am

A pair from the NYT today:

* Names Deal Cracks Swiss Bank Secrecy

* China Shares Regain Some Ground

danbloom · **Posted:** Fri Aug 21, 2009 4:36 am

jjmoney62 wrote:

A pair from the NYT today:

* Names Deal Cracks Swiss Bank Secrecy

* China Shares Regain Some Ground

Wow! A new journalism term is born: crash blossoms.....

and they are apparently blossoming all over. Somebody should put them in a book or a blog devoted to them...... hey, that's a good idea! Nessie3, with your permission, and giving full credit to you for coming up with this great "catch" and the coinage too, I will create a blog right now called "Crash Blossoms" and start cataloguing these things above and more as they come in. My crash blossom secretary will handle the details.

Nessie3, I set it up here:

http://amafubme.blogspot.com/

trimtofit · **Posted:** Mon Aug 24, 2009 11:52 am

This sort of enthusiasm for new argot makes me queasy. On the other hand, John McIntyre's incomplete glossary of endangered journalism jargon is an entertaining read.

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:19 am

Fears for Indian tiger after Chinese green light for sale of animal products
(Times Online)

Only about 30 to 40 tigers survive in the wild in China. But about 5,000 live in tiger farms, where they are bred at great speed.

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:52 am

• Many Sic! items are newspaper headlines whose brevity obfuscates. A post on Tuesday on the Testy Copy Editors forum led to a suggestion for a generic term: crash blossom. This is from an example posted in the thread, taken from the Japan Today site: “Violinist linked to JAL crash blossoms”. To interpret — Diana Yukawa, who lost her father in the 1985 Japan Airlines crash, has become a successful violinist. Thanks to Chris Waigl for telling me about this. (World Wide Words)

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Fri Sep 11, 2009 3:12 am

Aussie newspaper’s shock Caster claim (The Times of South Africa)

Editer · **Posted:** Fri Sep 11, 2009 9:06 am

Saw one a few days ago on the BBC site that said Army makes safe 600lb bomb. I'd have posted then but the TCE site was down, and by the time it was back up they'd changed the hed.

This reminded me of my favorite redundancy flag: What's the difference between a "dangerous weapon" and the other kind?

(Turns out someone had found a large piece of unexploded ordnance from WWII and the army disarmed it, thus making it safe. But the image of a giant bomb suitable for use as an end table did give pause.)

Lehane · **Posted:** Fri Sep 11, 2009 11:43 pm

Phillip Blanchard wrote:

“Violinist linked to JAL crash blossoms”. To interpret — Diana Yukawa, who lost her father in the 1985 Japan Airlines crash, has become a successful violinist. Thanks to Chris Waigl for telling me about this. (World Wide Words)

I'm so glad you specified a little more about the story, as when you click on the article link now you get:

Violinist linked to JAL crash blossoms
By May Masangkay

The requested article has expired, and is no longer available. Any related articles, and user comments are shown below.

It doesn't exactly make things any clearer! I think a local reader more familiar with the acrononym JAL might have a better chance of semi-understanding the headline, but it just goes to show you should almost never use acronyms in headlines unless they are so common as to be beyond misunderstanding.

Bill.

P.S. Hello from a brand new member - I'm an Irish copy editor in China. There's something you don't hear every day :-)

KfitzR · **Posted:** Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:27 am

Welcome indeed - I'm surprised there is any demand for editing Irish in China. Or should that be erse?

Lehane · **Posted:** Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:10 am

KfitzR wrote:

Welcome indeed - I'm surprised there is any demand for editing Irish in China. Or should that be erse?

Hi there Katie. I can only assume you're joking - I'm Irish, the copy editing is in China, and I thought it would go without saying it was through English! The new company I'm going to be working for - China Radio International http://www.crienglish.com - does also have services in Arabic, French, Spanish and German as well as Mandarin Chinese though, so I guess it's worth specifying. :-)

Bill.

KfitzR · **Posted:** Sun Sep 13, 2009 10:14 pm

I CAN tend to be terribly literal at times, and it IS part of my sense of humour, Bear with this testy lot and you will get to enjoy us.

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Mon Sep 14, 2009 1:39 am

KfitzR wrote:

Welcome indeed - I'm surprised there is any demand for editing Irish in China. Or should that be erse?

Able was I erse I saw Albion.

It would be "Irish" or "Irish Gaelic."

Editer · **Posted:** Mon Sep 14, 2009 10:45 am

There once was a man of Dun Laoghaire,
Who propounded an interesting thaoghaire:
That the language of Erse
Has a shortage of verse
As its spelling makes poets too waoghaire.

Bumfketeer · **Posted:** Wed Sep 16, 2009 11:02 am

Alle righte, alle righte.

Lehane · **Posted:** Thu Sep 17, 2009 1:54 am

Editer wrote:

There once was a man of Dun Laoghaire,
Who propounded an interesting thaoghaire:
That the language of Erse
Has a shortage of verse
As its spelling makes poets too waoghaire.

Hilarious! Although a fastidious editor back home would definitely add an accent called a fadha to Dún Laoghaire. As to the language, it's generally known simply as 'Irish' within Ireland, or 'Gaeilge' which means Gaelic in the language itself.

Bill.

P.S. My partner - a New Mexico native who high schooled in Lubbock - asks if your name means you edit'er!

Editer · **Posted:** Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:59 pm

I'll edit'er if she's game. Might be fun.

fev · **Joined:** Tue Nov 15, 2005 2:04 pm **Posts:** 340

I used to work in Boston
In a big department store
I used to work in Boston ...

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Fri Sep 18, 2009 4:35 am

No health coverage tied to 45,000 deaths a year (MSNBC)

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Fri Sep 25, 2009 11:50 pm

AT&T complains Google Voice blocks calls it can't

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sat Sep 26, 2009 8:15 am

jjmoney62 wrote:

AT&T complains Google Voice blocks calls it can't

The entire story is incomprehensible.

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Sat Sep 26, 2009 8:43 am

Quote:

AT&T Inc. says Google Voice curbs costs by refusing to connect calls to places where some local carriers give phone numbers to adult chat lines and conference-calling services to draw long distance calls.

Quote:

The company asks the FCC to stop rural carriers from boosting incoming calls and charging high fees, or to hold Google to the same rules.

Docsdoctor · **Posted:** Wed Sep 30, 2009 9:30 am

Framingham officer shot back at work

Wayne Countryman · **Posted:** Wed Sep 30, 2009 9:40 am

Docsdoctor wrote:

Framingham officer shot back at work

Appearing beside that story on the website:

Top articles in News & Opinion

1. Tufts University bans nookie if roomie ‘is present’

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Thu Oct 08, 2009 1:43 am

Motorway bones are missing woman

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Sat Oct 10, 2009 8:52 pm

Man donates rape reward to victim

**It's not what you think.**

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Mon Oct 12, 2009 8:08 pm

FYI
RICE FARMING
Rice — a staple of unstable future, funds?

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Thu Oct 15, 2009 6:29 pm

No Social Security COLA could prod $250 payments

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Sun Oct 18, 2009 6:10 pm

Wigeon painting tops stamp art contest [UPI]

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Mon Oct 19, 2009 9:12 pm

Many angry man wouldn't marry interracial couple [AP] hat tip: wsj.com

Editer · **Posted:** Thu Oct 22, 2009 3:50 am

Angels need bats to rise from dead to stay alive (USA Today)

JT · **Posted:** Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:50 am

Us and them department - from BBC News...

Flat body murder probe launched

Deck = A murder investigation has been launched after a woman's body was discovered in an Edinburgh flat

hound · **Posted:** Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:23 pm

Pay Czar to Slash Compensation

Heartodixie · **Posted:** Fri Oct 23, 2009 9:45 pm

Y'all do know that most of these are intentional and thought to be clever by the writers?

gdcfa · **Posted:** Sat Oct 24, 2009 10:40 am

That's what makes them egregious.

Editer · **Posted:** Sun Oct 25, 2009 9:03 pm

Feet from suicide blast, student survives

Bumfketeer · **Posted:** Sun Oct 25, 2009 11:17 pm

I think that's more two-faced than crash blossomish, but it is pretty damned funny. It must've taken me upward of two minutes to figure it out. But I'm kind of tired.

Heartodixie · **Posted:** Mon Oct 26, 2009 12:54 am

Multiple crash blossoms daily is the standard here. Here are two front-pagers that caught my eye this weekend:

"Dothan quilt
show honors
heritage"

(It's a wire story, so the paper didn't archive its version and its hed. The online version wouldn't have shown the breaks that make it blossom anyway.)

Online now, "Tide defensive lineman’s blocks salvage game."

TokenBrit · **Posted:** Tue Oct 27, 2009 2:44 pm

Man held over body in field find

KfitzR · **Posted:** Wed Oct 28, 2009 11:14 pm

Officers accused
of inciting violence
to testify before
police ethics panel

(Globe and Mail last weekend)

TokenBrit · **Posted:** Fri Nov 06, 2009 9:19 am

This one has me completely baffled:

Tiny tech sparks cell signal find

KfitzR · **Posted:** Fri Nov 06, 2009 10:22 pm

Obviously a story about a development by a tekkie company in Tiny Township (yes really) in northern Ontario. After that, I'm baffled.

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sat Nov 07, 2009 12:05 pm

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sun Nov 08, 2009 6:14 pm

Docsdoctor · **Posted:** Wed Nov 11, 2009 11:08 am

Technical issues dog schools

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Thu Nov 19, 2009 3:20 am

Thierry Henry clearly handled before playing the ball for William Gallas to score the equaliser which saw France win the play-off 2-1 on aggregate. (BBC Sport)

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Fri Nov 27, 2009 2:25 am

Polanski prepares for luxury Alpine house arrest (AP)

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Sat Nov 28, 2009 7:55 pm

Hajj devil stoning ritual biggest swine flu risk

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Mon Nov 30, 2009 3:51 am

Man arrested for different crime suspect in Chiba Univ student's murder

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Mon Nov 30, 2009 10:57 pm

Tacoma Suspect Said to Threaten to Shoot Officers

Bumfketeer · **Posted:** Wed Dec 02, 2009 9:39 pm

High-rating television show about urban life suspended

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Fri Dec 04, 2009 11:28 pm

Knox convicted, sentenced to 26 years in Italy (AP, via Yahoo News)

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Wed Dec 23, 2009 12:35 pm

Children's major player in tumor war

gdcfa · **Posted:** Sun Jan 03, 2010 10:01 am

Man injured after party dies; police seek suspect

KfitzR · **Posted:** Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:28 am

Now I know why party poopers have the bad rep.

hound · **Posted:** Fri Jan 15, 2010 8:29 am

GM plant to save millions from malaria

Yes, this one is regionally specific. But still..

Lehane · **Posted:** Fri Jan 15, 2010 11:33 am

Nessie3 wrote:

Knox convicted, sentenced to 26 years in Italy (AP, via Yahoo News)

You must sit under the sun, drink good wine and eat delicious food for the rest of your life, hahahaha!

Powderhorn · **Posted:** Tue Jan 19, 2010 4:48 pm

From the local rag:
Haitians flee capital seeking food

Editer · **Posted:** Tue Jan 19, 2010 7:07 pm

Capital is voracious and amoral.

Nessie3 · **Posted:** Sun Jan 24, 2010 9:16 am

Not a crash blossom, but certainly a groaner, from the same source:

Haitians mourn as rescuers find another survivor in rubble

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sat Jan 30, 2010 1:35 am

OK. This about wraps it up.

Bumfketeer · **Posted:** Sat Jan 30, 2010 1:39 pm

Sorry, but this has to be said before we wrap up: What an awful illustration.

Docsdoctor · **Posted:** Sun Feb 14, 2010 10:43 am

Billerica plotting solution to grave crunch
http://www.lowellsun.com/todaysheadlines/ci_14396295"

Bumfketeer · **Posted:** Sat Feb 20, 2010 11:51 pm

Floating college sinks; all safe

(sorry...no link)

Rio · **Posted:** Tue Feb 23, 2010 1:32 am

Hong Kong Auction Prompts Home-Asking-Price Rises, Standard Says

I especially like the "Standard says."

Lehane · **Posted:** Tue Feb 23, 2010 1:08 pm

Rio wrote:

Hong Kong Auction Prompts Home-Asking-Price Rises, Standard Says

I especially like the "Standard says."

Haha! Talk about trying to put the whole story in the headline. There's almost as much info in that head as in the three paragraphs beneath it :-)

Bill.

tommangan · **Posted:** Thu Mar 04, 2010 8:00 am

ON this morning's WSJ.Com homepage: Firms Tap Record Cash Piles for Deals

(no unfortunate but hilarious double meaning; merely incomprehensible)

tommangan · **Posted:** Fri Mar 12, 2010 11:22 pm

Yet another malodorous blossom from the wsj.com homepage:

Likely Fed Picks Back Low Rates

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Wed Mar 17, 2010 10:01 am

Bridge Over the Visa Moat for Musicians Trying to Enter the U.S.

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Thu Mar 25, 2010 8:22 pm

From Romenesko:

Stuever: Obama speech edits photo 'thrilling, gratifying and also terribly frightening'

Bumfketeer · **Posted:** Sat Mar 27, 2010 10:05 pm

Kudos for the last two, JJ

Powderhorn · **Posted:** Tue Apr 06, 2010 5:11 pm

NYT home page: Parents Reunited With Baby Pulled Rubble in Haiti

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Sat Apr 10, 2010 2:44 pm

Stimulus funds fuel prescribed burns in state forest [WickedLocalPlymouth]

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Sat May 01, 2010 9:07 am

BP plan deemed major spill from Gulf well unlikely

Powderhorn · **Posted:** Thu May 13, 2010 8:34 pm

Rogue Thai general aiding protesters shot in head

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Sat May 22, 2010 2:27 pm

Machine repairs dwarf thieves' haul
[The Scotsman]

Powderhorn · **Posted:** Fri May 28, 2010 2:46 am

Dow Surges as Europe Fears Ebb
(WSJ Online)

Rio · **Posted:** Sun May 30, 2010 12:04 am

Hollywood Eyes
Shortcut to TV

(The Wall Street Journal, May 22-23, lede story no less.)

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Wed Jun 02, 2010 1:09 pm

N.Y. man seeking help for stray dog arrested on DWI charges
[silive.com]

JayByrd · **Posted:** Tue Jun 08, 2010 10:22 am

FWP relocates grizzly killing livestock at Star Meadow Ranch

http://missoulian.com/news/state-and-re ... 002e0.html

Star Meadow Ranch: Home of the meanest cows in Montana...

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Sun Jun 13, 2010 10:27 am

Sebelius stumps for anti-childhood obesity plan [AP]

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Wed Jun 16, 2010 1:44 pm

Cop Punches Woman Video Goes Viral! [Right TV]

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Mon Jun 28, 2010 8:23 pm

Paterson police in search of missing 83-year-old woman may have Alzheimer's [N.J.com]

Denver cops kill man with fake gun [Denver Post]

hat tip: fark.com

In Faulty Computer Suit, Window to Dell’s Fall [Times]

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Mon Jun 28, 2010 9:21 pm

They fixed that last one. It's now:

In Faulty Computer Suit, Window to Dell’s Decline

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Tue Jun 29, 2010 10:50 am

Hold on. They "fixed" it again. This should be clear as a bell:

In Faulty-Computer Suit, Window to Dell Decline

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Tue Jun 29, 2010 7:27 pm

Suit Over Faulty Computers Highlights Dell’s Decline

The latest is a little klumsy, but understandable. Next time, perhaps someone will think about it before posting a headline. Wait. Never mind.

Wayne Countryman · **Posted:** Wed Jun 30, 2010 5:05 pm

But ... but ... the latest hed lacks wordplay.

Powderhorn · **Posted:** Thu Jul 15, 2010 11:26 am

AP:
Surgeon jailed for killing 3 appeals in Australia

J Kaufman · **Posted:** Mon Aug 02, 2010 9:38 pm

House Inquiry on Waters Tied to Bank [Times]

jjmoney62 · **Posted:** Tue Aug 03, 2010 3:47 pm

Favre's stringing us along mars legacy

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sun Aug 08, 2010 6:33 am

Are Americans' worries over the direction of prices inflated?

Editer · **Posted:** Tue Aug 10, 2010 9:22 pm

Russian Fires Approach Nuclear Plants

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Wed Aug 25, 2010 9:54 am

Council hires ban bid taxi firm

(Pointed out by John McIntyre.)

Rio · **Posted:** Fri Aug 27, 2010 11:44 pm

Malaysia and Jakarta Can’t Hammer Out Deal on Maids

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sat Aug 28, 2010 1:24 am

Rio wrote:

Malaysia and Jakarta Can’t Hammer Out Deal on Maids

That's a crappy headline, but I'm not sure it's a crash blossom.

Rio · **Posted:** Sat Aug 28, 2010 2:34 am

Phillip Blanchard wrote:

That's a crappy headline, but I'm not sure it's a crash blossom.

Didn't you have visions of bizarre carpentry? Or is it just me (and my equally twisted friend who pointed it out to me)?

Phillip Blanchard · **Posted:** Sat Aug 28, 2010 5:37 am

I did but I'm not sure that makes it a crash blossom. We may have to work on a definition. Since the term was not my invention, I am unqualified.

onceahack · **Posted:** Mon Aug 30, 2010 12:28 am

Phillip, it seems to me that one essential element of a crash blossom is a word that can serve as either a noun or a verb. In other words, it seems to me that the original and the majority of the follow-ups cited have a word that can serve as either a second verb or the object of the first.

So we have a pattern of subject-verb-ambiguous word pattern that can be interpreted as either subject-verb-object or subject-(verb phrase modifying the subject)-verb. Someone who recalls more grammar than I might come up with better terminology.

And a second essential element seems to be that, without the full story, it's next to impossible to figure out what in the heck is going on.

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